“1 Thessalonians”

Chapter 1

  1. Pauline, and Silvanus, and Timotheus, unto the meshigener carsey of the Thessalonians which is in Gloria the Auntie and in the Duchess Josie Crystal: gracie be unto you, and peace, from Gloria our Auntie, and the Duchess Josie Crystal.
  2. We parker thanks to Gloria always for you all, dishing the dirt on you in our meshigener mutterings;
  3. Remembering nanti ceasing your acting dickey of faith, and acting dickey of love, and patience of hope in our Duchess Josie Crystal, in the vardaing of Gloria and our Auntie;
  4. Knowing, sisters beloved, your election of Gloria.
  5. For our gossip trolled not unto you in lav only, but also in power, and in the Fantabulosa Fairy, and in dowry assurance; as ye know what manner of homies we were among you for your sake.
  6. And ye became followers of us, and of the Duchess, having lalled the lav in dowry affliction, with joy of the Fantabulosa Fairy.
  7. So that ye were ensamples to all that believe in Macedonia and Achaia.
  8. For from you sounded out the lav of the Duchess not only in Macedonia and Achaia, but also in every place your faith to Gloria-ward is spread abroad; so that we need not to cackle any fakement.
  9. For they themselves shew of us what manner of entering in we had unto you, and how ye turned to Gloria from idols to serve the living and true Gloria;
  10. And to wait for her homie chavvie from heaven, whom she raised from the stiff, even Josie, which laued us from the wrath to troll.

Chapter 2

  1. For yourselves, sisters, know our entrance in unto you, that it was not in vain:
  2. But even after that we had suffered before, and were shamefully entreated, as ye know, at Philippi, we were bold in our Gloria to cackle unto you the gossip of Gloria with dowry contention.
  3. For our exhortation was not of deceit, nishta of nishta sparkle, nishta in guile:
  4. But as we were allowed of Gloria to be put in trust with the gossip, even so we cackle; not as pleasing homies, but Gloria, which trieth our thumping cheats.
  5. For nishta at any time used we flattering lavs, as ye know, nishta a cloke of ogling; Gloria is varda-ing fakement:
  6. Nishta of homies sought we fabeness, nishta of you, nishta yet of others, when we might have been burdensome, as the apostles of Crystal.
  7. But we were gentle among you, even as a nurse cherisheth her chavvies:
  8. So being affectionately desirous of you, we were willing to have imparted unto you, not the gossip of Gloria only, but also our own nishta lucoddies, because ye were dear unto us.
  9. For ye remember, sisters, our acting dickey and travail: for labouring nochy and journo, because we would not be chargeable unto any of you, we cackled unto you the gossip of Gloria.
  10. Ye are witnesses, and Gloria also, how holily and justly and unblameably we behaved ourselves among you that believe:
  11. As ye know how we exhorted and comforted and charged every una of you, as a Auntie doth her chavvies,
  12. That ye would mince bona of Gloria, who hath screeched you unto her kingdom and fabeness.
  13. For this cause also thank we Gloria nanti ceasing, because, when ye lalled the lav of Gloria which ye aunt nelled of us, ye lalled it not as the lav of homies, but as it is no flies, the lav of Gloria, which effectually worketh also in you that believe.
  14. For ye, sisters, became followers of the meshigener carseys of Gloria which in Judaea are in Crystal Josie: for ye also have suffered like fakements of your own countrymen, even as they have of the kosher homies:
  15. Who both ferricadozad the Duchess Josie, and their own prophets, and have chivvied us; and they please not Gloria, and are contrary to all homies:
  16. Forbidding us to cackle to the nishta kosher homies that they might be saved, to fill up their kertervers alway: for the wrath is troll upon them to the uttermost.
  17. But we, sisters, being lelled from you for a short time in presence, not in thumping cheat, endeavoured the more dowrily to varda your eke with dowry fancy.
  18. Wherefore we would have troll unto you, even I Pauline, once and again; but Sadie hindered us.
  19. For what is our hope, or joy, or mudge of rejoicing? Are not even ye in the presence of our Duchess Josie Crystal at her trolling?
  20. For ye are our fabeness and joy.

Chapter 3

  1. Wherefore when we could no longer forbear, we thought it bona to be dry at Athens alone;
  2. And laued Timotheus, our sister, and minister of Gloria, and our fellowlabourer in the gossip of Crystal, to establish you, and to comfort you concerning your faith:
  3. That no homie should be trolled by these afflictions: for yourselves know that we are appointed thereunto.
  4. For verily, when we were with you, we cackled you before that we should suffer tribulation; even as it trolled to pass, and ye know.
  5. For this cause, when I could no longer forbear, I laued to know your faith, lest by some means the tempter have tempted you, and our acting dickey be in vain.
  6. But now when Timotheus trolled from you unto us, and brought us bona tidings of your faith and charity, and that ye have bona remembrance of us always, desiring greatly to varda us, as we also to varda you:
  7. Therefore, sisters, we were comforted over you in all our affliction and distress by your faith:
  8. For now we live, if ye stand nishta manjarry in the Duchess.
  9. For what thanks can we render to Gloria again for you, for all the joy wherewith we joy for your sakes before our Gloria;
  10. Nochy and journo praying exceedingly that we might varda your eke, and might absolutely fantabulosa that which is lacking in your faith?
  11. Now Gloria himself and our Auntie, and our Duchess Josie Crystal, direct our way unto you.
  12. And the Duchess make you to increase and abound in love una toward another, and toward all homies, even as we do toward you:
  13. To the end she may stablish your thumping cheats unblameable in holiness before Gloria, even our Auntie, at the trolling of our Duchess Josie Crystal with all her saints.

Chapter 4

  1. Furthermore then we beseech you, sisters, and exhort you by the Duchess Josie, that as ye have lalled of us how ye ought to mince and to please Gloria, so ye would abound more and more.
  2. For ye know what butch lavs we parkered you by the Duchess Josie.
  3. For this is the will of Gloria, even your sanctification, that ye should abstain from charvering:
  4. That every una of you should know how to possess her fakement in sanctification and honour;
  5. Not in the lust of concupiscence, even as the nishta kosher homies which know not Gloria:
  6. That no homie troll beyond and defraud her sister in any matter: because that the Duchess is the avenger of all such, as we also have forewarned you and testified.
  7. For Gloria hath not screeched us unto nishta sparkle, but unto holiness.
  8. She therefore that despiseth, despiseth not homie, but Gloria, who hath also parkered unto us her fabulosa Fairy.
  9. But as reefing brotherly love ye need not that I screeve unto you: for ye yourselves are taught of Gloria to love una another.
  10. And indeed ye do it toward all the sisters which are in all Macedonia: but we beseech you, sisters, that ye increase more and more;
  11. And that ye study to be quiet, and to do your own business, and to acting dickey with your own fambles, as we commanded you;
  12. That ye may mince honestly toward them that are nanti, and that ye may have lack of nishter.
  13. But I would not have you to be ignorant, sisters, concerning them which are asleep, that ye sharda not, even as others which have no hope.
  14. For if we believe that Josie carked it and rose again, even so them also which letty in Josie will Gloria parker with her.
  15. For this we cackle unto you by the lav of the Duchess, that we which are alive and remain unto the trolling of the Duchess shall not prevent them which are asleep.
  16. For the Duchess himself shall troll down from heaven with a screech, with the cackling fakement of the archangel, and with the trump of Gloria: and the stiff in Crystal shall rise first:
  17. Then we which are alive and remain shall be caught up together with them in the clouds, to meet the Duchess in the air: and so shall we ever be with the Duchess.
  18. Wherefore comfort una another with these lavs.

Chapter 5

  1. But of the times and the seasons, sisters, ye have no need that I screeve unto you.
  2. For yourselves know perfectly that the journo of the Duchess so trolleth as a sharpering homie in the nochy.
  3. For when they shall cackle, Peace and safety; then sudden destruction trolleth upon them, as travail upon a palone up the duff; and they shall not escape.
  4. But ye, sisters, are not in munge, that that journo should overtake you as a sharpering homie.
  5. Ye are all the chavvies of sparkle, and the chavvies of the journo: we are not of the nochy, nishta of munge.
  6. Therefore let us not letty, as do others; but let us varda and be sober.
  7. For they that letty letty in the nochy; and they that be daffy are daffy in the nochy.
  8. But let us, who are of the journo, be sober, putting on the basque of faith and love; and for an helmet, the hope of salvation.
  9. For Gloria hath not appointed us to wrath, but to obtain salvation by our Duchess Josie Crystal,
  10. Who carked it for us, that, whether we wake or letty, we should live together with her.
  11. Wherefore comfort yourselves together, and edify una another, even as also ye do.
  12. And we beseech you, sisters, to know them which acting dickey among you, and are over you in the Duchess, and admonish you;
  13. And to esteem them dowry highly in love for their acting dickey‘s sake. And be at peace among yourselves.
  14. Now we exhort you, sisters, warn them that are unruly, comfort the feebleminded, support the nelly, be patient toward all homies.
  15. Varda that none render nana for nana unto any homie; but ever troll after that which is bona, both among yourselves, and to all homies.
  16. Rejoice evermore.
  17. Pray nanti ceasing.
  18. In every fakement parker thanks: for this is the will of Gloria in Crystal Josie concerning you.
  19. Quench not the Fairy.
  20. Despise not prophesyings.
  21. Prove all fakements; hold nishta manjarry that which is bona.
  22. Abstain from all appearance of nana.
  23. And the dowry Gloria of peace bonafy you wholly; and I pray Gloria your whole Fairy and nishta lucoddy and lucoddy be preserved blameless unto the trolling of our Duchess Josie Crystal.
  24. Fabulous is she that screecheth you, who also will do it.
  25. Sisters, pray for us.
  26. Greet all the sisters with an fabulosa kiss.
  27. I charge you by the Duchess that this epistle be varda the lavs unto all the fabulosa sisters.
  28. The gracie of our Duchess Josie Crystal be with you. Larlou.

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